How do i know if my ex is thinking about me?

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in Relationship Advice by
Ok, so - I want to ask you guys if your intuitive feeling about an ex still thinking about you and having emotions for you has ever been correct? Or is it just wishful thinking?

I've had this intuitive feeling very strongly lately. I don't know if there could be anything in it?
My story - the short but still long version: As some of you may know my ex-bf left me 11 months ago. Our relationship was magical, but due to a stressful time at work for my part and a stressful time for him regarding his housing situation, etc., things became sort of stressful in total in the end. Suddenly after a small vacation, he'd been on he asked me for a break - out of the blue. We went on it, but I ended up asking him for a clear answer.

He got angry, said it was up to me and if it made me feel so awful for waiting for his decision we should probably break it off. So we did.

Right there we decided not to be friends, we both acted angrily.

Then in the period after he would text me messages and call me cute names. Then when he came to pick up his stuff from my place I told him he should stop calling me those names, because it made me confused. He seemed angry about that too and claimed it meant nothing.

Time passed. I contacted him a few times over the next months (birthday greetings etc.) and he didn't really reply. Then I found this page and went to NC for a couple of months. Then he started sending me a few random texts not asking about anything just jokes etc. I replied and then he wouldn't reply back.
A few more months passed. Then I broke NC by sending him a funny text about a joke we once had. He replied straight away and asked if he should call me up. We talked for 45 min about...well, nothing really. Just jobs etc.

Then two months NC again. Then I bumped into him. The first time was in a street and I walked on thinking he didn't see me, but then I noticed he was looking. I continued walking though.
A week after I met him at a party. I was drunk and he tried talking to me several times.

Asked me if we were "cool". I said yeah. He told me I still looked really stunning and I said yeah, you too. Before leaving he tried dancing with me, but some other guy came and picked me up on the floor, so I ended up dancing with him instead and my ex first seemed frustrated then left.

Short after he left comments on my pic on FB.

Then I met him at a huge meeting. Tried to say hi and he shivered when I touched him and looking kind of scared. He said hi and then ignored me.

And night when I was drunk two weeks ago I met him, we were drunk, we flirted... I ended up sending him a flirty text, he asked to meet me to "hook up", I agreed to meet but didn't know what to expect. Right away he started gripping me all over, flirting...and then we kissed. But it is the most emotionless and harsh kiss I've ever experienced, so I wanted to stop it. I said it didn't feel emotionless for my part.

He said he didn't know where he was emotionally and hadn't known it for the past year... He said he'd thought a LOT about our sex. Which WAS amazing. I said I got angry back then because he never said why he left. He told me he still doesn't know. He tried convincing me into having sex several times, I played a bit along, but then eventually said no, that it wasn't a good idea. Then he kissed me on the forehead and held me for a while. Then he tried one last time, I backed off, he seemed a bit annoyed, I left.

Haven't heard from him since...

So... My intuition is he still has feelings for me - but that he is too confused about everything to come back. What do you guys think?

And - have you ever experienced having this really strong intuition - and then being right?

2 Answers

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First and Foremost - I get these same Intuition Alerts in my Head too!

Sometimes I so Hope they turn out to be True!

Secondly - this Boy that you seem to be talking about seems quite Considerate (well a million times much more Considerate than my Ex).

Try Giving it a Shot, but, not all in One Go. Slowly, but steadily, Approach him; begin talking lightly about general topics for about a week or so, and then get your conversations more Intense. At the same time, don't drag any things up that have led to negative Attributes between the two of you in the Past.

and another Rule of Thumb - I know this may sound a bit crazy, but if ever you feel emotional about something, just Don't ever look at him as a Shoulder to Cry On.

Rely on someone, or something else.

Seriously, Men in real life are completely different from those Portrayed in Movies!

Boys generally Prefer Girls who seem 'Emotionally Robust'. Although I am very well aware of the Fact that that won't be possible with us Ladies, since we are much more Delicate in every Way.

I think this was one of the reasons why my Lover became my Ex Lover.

Don't let this Repeat to You.

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I have been badly burned in the past by following my intuition. ( I think that with me I have slightly crossed the line into delusions in the past so I'm now very careful with not putting too much faith in those feelings.)

I'm not sure what I believe. I tend to follow my heart everywhere and live by my feelings and it's not the best. I think it's safest to act based on logical thought but I don't totally discount my intuition.

I've had so many weird experiences in the past like for instance when I was younger I fell head over heels for someone who only wanted to be casual lovers with me and nothing more. We were not speaking for months and I dreamt that they told me they were moving overseas and said goodbye.

The next day I left my phone at home by accident, something I never did, and when I got home there was a message from my ex-lover saying that they were moving to Australia and goodbye, take care. That was after months of No Contact, and this was someone who said and still maintains that there is nothing between us.

I recently dreamt about my ex in a very intense realistic way and asked him about it and he hadn't dreamt of me at all. However, his disposition to me had softened considerably so part of me thinks there could be something in it. It could be wishful thinking though- ever since I so strongly felt there was something between me and that ex-lover and was totally rejected I do not follow my gut solely anymore. I've learned to be less flaky and slightly more practical!

I think Kennedy you are right in seeing that as he said only recently he still hasn't emotionally figured himself out its best to leave it and if you ruin into him be friendly and natural. I wear my heart totally on my sleeve- I think if it was me I would just how I felt - that the kiss was so unemotional and that's why you stopped as you had hoped for more than that.